Thursday, 5 January 2017

Negative thinking traps that hold us back.

Firstly Happy New Year! Everyone likes to jump on the resolution bandwagon but here’s a couple of things I think we should definitely drop for 2017.

Thinking the grass is greener on the other side.
The idea of being envious of someone on the ‘other side’ is a dead end mentality, surely if you are busy looking at others doesn’t the same apply to them? The notion of not being grateful for what we have and constantly looking over at others is draining and can leave one feeling bitterly dissatisfied with life.
Instead of following this old saying, flip it on its head with the mentality that ‘the grass is greener where you water it!’
Falling into the trap of resenting others for their successes is a poisonous attitude to have and should be dropped immediately. Obviously with the rise of social media platforms it is a little distracting to not feel this way. This is because we all post the bests bits online, what I share on my Instagram is a collection of my highlights, the sugar coated moments of my life.
I only post about 2% of my daily activities online so don’t be fooled into thinking this life I share with you is perfect, I have down days too I just choose to not show them online.
The antidote to this green grass mentality is to focus and discipline your mind on your own business, own health and own successes, by doing so you eliminate room for envy on others and enjoy the fruits of your hard labour. Stop comparing yourself to others, only look back to see how far you have come and improved.

Self-pity, the world owes you nothing!
Feeling sorry for yourself is draining, it’s a common reaction to stressful events. In helpless times the easiest way out is to feel sorry for yourself. This attitude doesn’t help overcome the problem at hand, it simply wastes time; time that could be spent trying to find resolutions to issues.
When willowing in self-pity we expect others to notice our hardships and sympathise with us. The trap here is feeling a sense of entitlement, the idea that other people owe it to you to help get you out of a rut.
The brutal truth is they won’t. Everyone has their own drama to deal with, whether they choose to show it or not.
No one can adjust your attitude for you, no one can make you feel better. Your happiness is your responsibility, do not play the victim. If other people cannot help you, help yourself because the world owes you nothing. Switching to this attitude along with practising gratitude will make you miles more happier and in charge of your emotions.

No one controls you.
The feeling of not having control in your life because of someone else or a situation is a spin off emotion from self-pity, also a decoy into passing the responsibility and blame to someone else.
There is always a solution to every problem. Feeling trapped or controlled is detrimental to your progress and growth. No matter how hard you try, you won’t be able to achieve certain goals due to this mental cap.
Only you can chose the way you feel and decide what you focus on. This life is what we make it, we have the capability to be happy, carefree or stressed and depressed. The choice is ours, both ends of the spectrum require energy, it’s up to us where we focus it.
The discipline on what to focus on comes from within. One quote I found online and stuck with me was; ‘A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity, an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.’

It’s slow progress and hard to kill old habits but I’ve been practising the above for the past three years and it’s lead to a much more confident, happier and grateful Mitika, hope it helps you the same way.

Outfit - Top/Bershka Earrings/KateSpade Choker/DIY

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